I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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