We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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