is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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