We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
