when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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