Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
