1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
