If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
