drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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