How'd it feel making her break her religion?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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