she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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