Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
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