So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
