I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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