He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
