He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
