coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize