I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
