it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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