Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
