Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
