***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I am naked and annoyed.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Randomize
