Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize
