I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
