Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
