I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize