so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Randomize
