So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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