you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
