Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
