there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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