To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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