All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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