Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
God gave him joint rollers for hands
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Randomize
