I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
