the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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