I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
