Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
