so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
