Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
