You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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