When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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