you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
