fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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