She announced her abortion via fbk
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
