Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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