On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
