return my video game
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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