We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
