I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
