But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
