i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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