Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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